First off, I will just say, if you are in middle school and cannot read the word "Elfland" your parents should be smacked. I suppose I can make allowance for "cataract" because that's not exactly a common word, but, still. I had them read Tennyson's Bugle Song. By the time you're eleven years old, you should be at the height of your reading ablities (making allowances for dyslexia, and other learning disabilities). Even if you don't know all the words, you should have a good enough grasp of your Mother Tounge to pronounce them.
The first night, Tuesday, I had two girls. Yep. Two girls. Ten had signed up for the following night. Thirty to forty my ass- that awful Tom Sawyer they did last year must've put most of them off.
Anyway, the one was a (comparatively) mature girl, and more talented than the 6th grader she is would at first suggest. The other was I assume her new best friend, because she wouldn't have been there otherwise- never done theatre, not a great singer.
I realise now that she's better than I first thought. She couldn't sing, but she mentioned her mom's a high school teacher: I gather she's the English teacher because that girl could read poetry, blew me away. Funny thing, though, she couldn't pronounce bugle to save her life (buggle), but she had that poetic rhythm down.
The rest of them were today. Man, do I understand the secretary laughing and saying she was sure I'd find princess material. There was obligatory Little Miss Additude, I will quote her audition sheet. "I would like a lot of lines. I CAN learn them." She's a little intimidating, and I think she's going to get cast as The Enchantress, because none of the other kids have much natural menace in them.
Then, Space Cadets. Holy Moly do we have Space Cadets. Both of them called Sarah. What is it about the name Sarah that is cursed? I love the name, but every single Sarah I have ever met in real life is either a minion of Satan or a Space Cadet. The first Sarah is taller than I am, which is going to freak me out because she's 12.
And when I mean Space Cadet, I do not speak lightly. I handed her the copy of the poem I wanted them to read, and she looks at it, and asks me if she's supposed to read it. I laugh, and in my best sarcastic voice, I tell her that she's just supposed to look at it and then stare blankly into space. And she did, because she honestly thought I was serious. I told her later she had the distracted hummingbird thing down real good, and she replied that she gets really excited about shiny objects, and that her parents are getting her some of those light up shoes for Christmas. Thank you, parents o' Tall Sarah for ensuring that she falls and breaks her nose watching her feet light up while she walks.
Then there's a kid who I am certain is a perfect angel around grown ups and a brat around kids her own age. This would be the girl with the perfectly curled hair, totally co-ordinated outfit bedecked with sequins (like, classy sequins, not like "my Mom bejeweled me a cat shirt!"), and eye shadow. Purple eye shadow that co-ordinated with the outfit and her nail polish. I have never looked as good as this kid.
She didn't murder Yesterday too badly though, which is a sin committed by most everyone. I'd like to have a semi-major role for her, because she'd be good in any part, but I have this back of my mind feeling that she'd just be good, she wouldn't be "great". One of those kids who will go on and get A's all through high school but never do anything really outstanding.
There are two boys I will probably cast as the Pages, because they both have good reading voices (and are both funny looking, the one has sticky out ears and the other has rabbit teeth). Rabbit Teeth Boy -I'd rather not write names- is a creative/weird kid. Like, we played What Are You Doing? and he came up with "vandalising a house", "throwing a snow globe at a hot air balloon" and one other one that blew my mind because he didn't have to stand there and think for ten minutes to come up with them.
There was one incredibly sweet and shy girl who warbled her way through two verses of Amazing Grace. Frankly, it was awful. I can't tell if she's tone deaf, or just scared, or both. I think it's probably both, but I didn't have the heart to stop her becuase it was so incredibly brave of her to get up there and do that. I have a feeling if there's any kid who could come out of that a sucess story, it'd be her. She's one I'd love to challenge, because I think it'd be good for her.
There is an absolutely beautiful little Iranian girl that I would cast as the princess, but she's not ready for it. Her schedule won't work out enough to have her at rehearsals very often, either. She's going to steal the attention of every parent whose not so utterly focused on their kid that they don't even know what the rest of the story was about.
There's another girl who, "wants to be remembered for her role more than a day after the play closes". I'm casting her as the union peasant representative, Donald, and Lucy's love interest, Pat. People will remember that, all right.
I keep forgetting how young these kids are. The first Harry Potter book came out when I was a freshman or sophomore in high school. That was eight years ago, when most of these kids would've been ummm, four. It's gotten to the point that some of them don't recognise the name JK Rowling. As in, I mentioned her, I got a couple of blank stares. Then I said, "Harry Potter?" and one of them goes, "I've seen those movies". I've never objected to HP as kids reading material, I just think it's a little creepy that adults get so into it. I suppose after so many Dan Brown and Stephen King books you forget what literature is altogether.
In spite of the fact they can't read or spell, half of them claim to be fluent in Pig-Latin. I don't understand how they manage it. I never learned Pig-Latin. I can sometimes interpret it, but I think Ubbidubbi is cooler (02134!), though I can't speak it either.
There's one other boy who was in a show at the uni a year or so ago, (according to all of the girls in the room), and he's in choir. He signed up to audition, but he had basketball and couldn't come. While that's a potentially bad sign, I need somebody to play Lucy's true love, and it pretty much has to be a boy, and he has to be willing to sing. I think this is the boy. So, I let him in on their words of recommendation, but I told them to tell him to get his parents to get hold of me.
Except, the other shocker, all these kids have cell phones. I suppose from a certain point of view, this makes sense, because none of the kids are allowed to walk home (the school's at a busy intersection with no lights or sidewalks), but cell phones?! Sparkly cell phones with fancy ass ring tones? Uber-Co-ordinated-Girl pulled her's out to call her mom to pick her up and goes, "I have three missed calls? I can't believe I missed three calls!"
When I was in high school we'd get them taken away from us and our parents would have to come and pick them up. Never mind the fact the school took out their payphone and wouldn't let students use the phone in the office, and teachers were told not to let students use their phones. So, pretty much, if you lived on the other side of town (for example) and you needed to be picked up after school, you were screwed, unless you had a cell phone.
I am incredibly worn out. I was up until two this morning and woke up again at seven to finish work on a seven minute scene for Playwrighting, and then kids on top of that. I have to go start some washing, but then I might take a nap.